


anxiety attacks

by bookishpanda



Series: Sanders Sides Shorts [5]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Food mention, Gen, anxiety attack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:15:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28228992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookishpanda/pseuds/bookishpanda
Summary: Virgil tries making a sandwich, but his anxiety has other plans for him.
Series: Sanders Sides Shorts [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2067366
Kudos: 17





	anxiety attacks

Virgil was in the kitchen making a sandwich when Patton came in, emptying the contents of the dishwasher into their proper cabinets. The clanging, heavy breathing, and movement made Virgil’s hands shake, and he struggled to clean up after himself with the other side weaving in and out of the small spaces. 

He had gotten pretty good at hiding these attacks from the others. He huffed under his breath and quickly retreated into his room, the only place that felt safe. 

He turned his music up _loud_ to try to drown out the thoughts. But his chest heaved and the sandwich sat on the desk, uneaten. He was suffocating again.

He didn't think that there wasn't a trigger. He didn't think Patton could be capable of that. But the clanging and the closeness and the speedy movements— it set his teeth on edge and turned his vision red. 

Sometimes those things didn't trigger an attack, so why _then_?

It probably had something to do with the fact that he hadn't fallen asleep until four o’clock that morning, and he was brutally awoken by Remus’ nails clawing at his door at 6:30. He tried (and failed) to go back to sleep, ultimately giving up when his need to pee was greater than his need to sleep. 

And so he drank a big mug of green tea to wake him up. He seemed okay after that, spending the next few hours watching a new show on Hulu. But then he was making a sandwich and his space was limited and—

He couldn't cope with it, sometimes. It made him want to lay down on the floor and never get up again (which, coincidentally, was a method he used to try to get to sleep at 1:30 that morning, but it failed so he laid back in bed watching old youtube videos). 

As he stared at his uneaten sandwich he could hear silverware clanking; the others were probably eating their lunches, now, too. Through the wall he could hear Roman’s voice, probably coming up with ideas or singing or being his usual annoying self. He hated sharing a wall with the prince, just hearing his voice set him on edge. 

He ignored the snapchat that Janus sent him. He noticed a text come in from Logan and set his phone to “do not disturb” and then turned it off completely and threw it in a drawer when he couldn't bear to have its blankness mocking him any longer. 

He tried to regulate his breathing. In, out, in, out. 

Five things he saw: the light from his laptop, the uneaten sandwich, his water bottle, his hands shaking, and the shadow of someone walking past his door. 

Four things he felt: the bed bouncing under him with every movement he made, the hood of his jacket shifting as he buried his head into his pillow, the soft grazes from the air conditioning, lonely. 

Three things he could hear: the fan whirring softly, silverware clanking (he knew he wasn't alone), Roman’s voice. 

Two things he could smell: the relish he added to his sandwich, remnants of the green tea he had earlier. 

One thing he could taste: the sandwich as he finally lifted it to his lips and took a bite. 


End file.
